Physical Prayer

Last night was my night to go sharing. As a community team we each committed to a certain day that we would go sharing in order to get more people going sharing after the meetings. Anyway I went with my friends Hyram Ho, and Katie. When we went, I felt "out of season," I had a back ache and was tired. I told the two that they lead in who to initiate with, because of how I was feeling.
As we went on, I was sort of praying and singing, mostly for the pain to leave my back. We kept going up to people, and each time we got shot down. We then went up to these girl and this guy, and did the surveys with them and started getting into a good conversation with them, when their parents walked up to us, and their mom looked at us like we were freaks. I said to her in a most cheerful way, "Hi! I'm Jessica!" and held out my hand. No response. I answered with a pretend hand shake and brought my hand back. The girl and guy then said that they needed to go, so I asked the two if they would like a booklet. "no that's alright."
Shot down again.
"Man! We keep running into walls!" I said as we were walking away. I then felt to pray against these walls. So as we were walking I started punching these imaginary walls. I wasn't embarrassed by what I was doing. I then proceeded to grab my sword, and started breaking the walls with that. I don't think I looked crazy to anyone watching. I mean it wasn't full on attack but as we were walking. This was the physical version of what I was praying.
Then Katie saw this guy sitting by himself. So Hyram and I went up to him. Hyram told him that we were Christians seeking to tell people about Christ and asked him if we could talk to him. "sure" he said, there was one wall torn down. As we were talking to him we found out that he was raised going to Church, but only goes for Christmas and Easter. He new that the only way to heaven is through believing in Jesus Christ. His problem though was that he questioned people who accept Christ as their savior, and yet deny Him by their life style. He said that he wasn't doing a lot of good in his life, so he was going to hell, because he didn't want to accept Christ if we was going to live a bad life style. We tried and tried to explain that there is grace, but we were somehow hitting this wall, He still didn't understand that these people could be saved. He then said that his wife (it was their 25th anniversary) was waiting for him so we asked him if we could walk with him. Then as we were walking, Hyram started to explain how accepting Christ, is like saying "I do" at the alter. Once you say "I do" you are married, with this you have the choice to either build the relationship or not. He explained that he could do only one thing for his wife and still be her husband (now he would be a bad husband but he would still be her husband). With that I saw something click in his head. (Yessssss! Another wall broken down! Thank you Father for answering my prayers!) I tried to help by explaining the story of Hosea, taking the whore, Gomer, as a wife. Basically showing him that this is how God is with us. Then with that we left.
I think that gave him a new perspective. It was just so interesting how that prayer was finally answered as we were leaving. God works in mysterious ways! I love God!
I love you all, God bless you!
Jessica

"Command C, Command V"

Hey Guys!
I will be arriving at John Wayne Airport at 8:53PM, on Saturday, August 13th via Northwest Airlines, Flight 393.
so if you all want to see me before I go to Yucaipa for the weekend meet me in the baggage claim in 3 weeks! :D
I miss you all SOOOOO much!!!
I love you!

Jessica

(look its the same message that is on the community blog ...train)

You guys can pray for me that I don't focus on coming home too much. I am really excited to see you all, but I am afraid that it has been getting my mind off of project, which makes me miss out on something that the Lord might be trying to teach me. He has me here for 10 weeks not 7, I just need to remember that!

Okay, I really got to get going! I love you all so dearly! May the Lord bless you in all your ways. May He use you all in mighty ways whether you are working, at church, at home, on a trip, grocery shopping, or wherever! The Lord guide you and give you wisdom!

Love always,
Jessica

Prayer and Intercession

So I think I need to up date a little!
okay so last time I talked about how I had the opportunity to speak about prayer. Well last Thursday I spoke about intercession and why it is so important. It was so cool. I probably only talked about 5 to 10 minutes, but i feel that the Lord really spoke through me (totally His grace!). I talked about how we are co-laborers with Christ and that intercession is speaking on behalf of someone else. I mean I can't really put it all into words but it was cool because I was able to challenge them to pray more. I talked about Elijah and how even thought god told him that the rain would come. God still wanted him to pray, and not only once but 7 times which is the number of completion. Meaning that he needed to pray until it happened.
I feel like so many times in our prayer lives we get so apathetic. We just sit down and say "God, please save 'so-and-so.' amen." how come we don't pray like Elijah? How come we don't pray until it is completed? Why don't we lie face down on the ground crying out for the lost begging for God to send his spirit?
Jesus said "The spirit is willing but the Flesh is weak." so may times I have wanted to cry out to God for my family and friends, for my Dad who isn't saved. But all I did was just sit on the couch and prayed a little. Yes, the Lord knows what we are going to pray before we pray it, and he knows our heart. But he wants to see our passion. So many times he talks about laboring in prayer, wrestling in prayer. Lets do that! Lets Cry out to God, lets pray to the lord of the harvest! Lets pray to the healer. God Cares! He wants to hear our requests and he wants to see our hearts! "The Spirit is willing but the Flesh is weak."

I love you all and miss you! God be with you and bless you!
love always,
Jessica

Intercession

Cool thing that happened was a few weeks ago during prayer time they told us to get into groups of 3 or 4 and pray for our co-workers. Which was typical of our non-fervent prayer time. during this all the staff came in dressed in black and started tying us up and duck taping us together. At first I, like many saw this as funny. We laughed. Then one student stood up, hands bound and shouted "stop laughing! You guys don't get this! Our brothers and sisters in Christ are really going through this, and all you can do is laugh!" one of the staff leaders shouted "Lets see you pray now!" this student started crying out to God! People started to pray. I got out of the group that I was in and fell on my face and started crying out for the missionaries in foreign countries, the lost, and the persecuted. It was such a good time of intercession. The lord kept showing my countries to pray for, and broke my heart. I praise God because, I have been desiring a greater passion for prayer, and the Lord is working on me.

When the staff is away the students will play!

Okay! So here is what is new:
Staff is officially gone!
now for the next five weeks the students rule!
I am co-in charge of the outreach team! The one job that I didn't want ha ha! The Lord is so funny that way! Cool thing though, I can see that this summer he is really going to work on my heart for outreach and the lost.
this Thursday me and my co-leader Luke will be talking during equipping time. He is going to talk about the heart behind outreach. Not just the normal things that we hear but about how evangelism comes out of love for God and not just your doing it because God commands us to. It will be good despite my poor summary. I then will bounce off of him with why prayer is important in evangelism. I am so excited about this because I know that the lord is going to teach me a lot about prayer. One thing that I have been asking the lord is for a bigger passion for prayer, I think God will work through this. ;)

love you all and miss you all so much!
Jessica

The Lord is good!!!

Here is an update on what the lord is doing here in VA!
last week was killing the giants the week, which is a week were you set evangelism goals! Anyway! I was blessed to lead FOUR PEOPLE TO CHRIST!!! Oh my goodness! Praise GOD! Two of them were these two high school girls who were like best friends! It was so cute, they were so willing and ready! It was neat because before I went through the four spiritual laws with them, they told me and my friend Ashley who was with me that they didn't even know a Christian. So cool how God worked! HE ROCKS!

The other was a homeless guy who just wanted forgiveness so bad. He prayed the prayer and after he accepted Christ into his life, he said that he felt better. It was neat because he told me that he wanted to get off of alcohol and realized that it wasn't going to happen unless he humbled himself. With that I got to share how it was only through Christ that my sister got off of narcotics. I could also see that he was real about it all when he told me that he wished there was a way that I could know he was doing better. Instead of asking for my address, or phone number, he told me the name of this guy that works at a church on the corner, and told me that he would work with the guy and tell him how I was, and if I called him, he would tell me how George was doing (that is his name by the way).

the other guy was this kid from Chicago, who was going to leave the next day. When I asked him which circle* represented his life he pointed at the circle with the Cross inside. I was like "oh you are a Christian!" He was like "No, no! I thought you said which one do you want to be!" he was so willing and ready, and it was so cool to see God fix the misunderstanding.

God is awesome! I miss you all! I love you all! God Bless!

super-duper-quick post!

Hey guys quick update!
I didn't get the job at the surf shop :( I really wanted to because I wanted to reach out to the teenage girls that worked there. (gosh! I have so much I want to add to that!)anyway I work at this souvenir shop with this girl, Jen, from Crusade, and with this guy, Milan. He is from Bulgaria, he is so sweet and funny. Its cool because I really feel like Jen and I are connecting with him. I hope that we can hang out with him.
Could you guys pray for that? He has two jobs so he works in the day and the night. Also just pray for my heart! It keeps getting jealous of stupid stuff. grr.
Anyway, there is so much that I want to tell you guys! You can call me anytime! If I can't talk, my phone will be off or something. :)
I miss you all a lot!
I love you!
-Jessica

3 in one setting! (I hope you all enjoy these updates)

For those of you who don’t know what I am doing in Virginia Beach:

I am here with Campus Crusade for Christ. For 10 weeks! During this time we get a job and do outreach on the beach. We also are learning about of ministry skills and in five weeks all the Campus Crusade staff will leave and we will have to run all the night meetings, outreach and community programs ourselves. This will teach us a lot of leadership skills, which are always good! ;) So if you all want to keep us in your prayers that would be great!

I have found one more!

I think it was yesterday afternoon. (I am not sure the days just blur together) I was lying on my bed just waking up from a well-needed nap (yes it was yesterday) and Nicole comes in. I said, “hi sweetie! Come lay down!” So she got in bed next to me (I love that about girls! I love it that we can just do that :) so awesome!). Anyway, I started talking to her about stuff. I found out that she had been to the International House of Prayer for a Conference. Which happened to be Onething, the same conference that Stephen, Jeanette Mike, Doug, and I went to in February. So basically I found out that she believes in the gifts of the Holy Spirit. So awesome! Sometime I just want to get together with her and just worship, pray, and intercede! (She is on the worship team, awesome guitarist!)

Which reminds me of something else. We had a worship and praise time last night. Which was cool but so structured. I felt like it was hard to take it serious. Anyway, I was talking to a girl, Chelsea who plays guitar, and was telling her that I wish it wasn’t so structured. By this I mean, they sing for 30 min, pray in groups for 15 minutes, then shout out thank-yous to God. Now don’t get me wrong, this isn’t bad. I just would love to see more worship and freedom in prayer. Like just open it up and have some things to focus on in prayer but let people pray for longer than 15 minutes. If someone wants to worship, then go for it. Or you could have a time for the singing and a time for the “speaking-type” prayer. But lets sing more! Lets pray more. When you do different things and get in groups it breaks peoples focus. People start to talk to each other. So anyway, I was talking to her about it and she was in agreement. Maybe we can just have a time for worship and prayer outside of those meetings.

I just want to pray more. I need it. I need more passion for it.

I got a job and an interview! Yay!

I for sure got a job at this souvenir shop but I also have an interview for this Quiksilver style shop. I’d be cool to have that job but there isn’t anyone from Crusade working there which will make it harder to witness. See at this other shop there will probably be two of us there and we will be working with the foreign people helping them out and teaching them what to do. This is good because it will be a great opportunity to witness. So I seriously need to seek a lot of wisdom on this. Because I can see how God would want to use me in both places. Please pray for me guys!

So Nice I Posted Twice!

Second day. I don’t have reception right now. Well it says I do but can’t find the server or something. Anyway, I love the people here. Today we got together with our bible study groups and the leader. The group consists of four girls, they live in our 3-bedroom/12-girl apartment. I am so excited about these girls. The Lord is so good. There is one girl who I felt like I didn’t click well with, and when I saw that she was in my group I thought, “oh Awesome God! This will be cool.” See she is kind of a stand off kind of girl (I can’t hug her :( ) which I am not too used to, but I know its not me, its just her personality. I was excited because I wanted to try to get to know her more and get past our personality differences.

Another thing that was cool was that today asked God to reveal to me any one who believed more of what I believe (I guess you could say charismatic). Well one of the girls in my bible study said that her mom goes to a charismatic church so later I talked to her about it and found that she didn’t speak in tongs but believed in it and is still looking into it. (Shh! Don’t tell crusade that we talked about tongs!) Also that she believes in the gifts of the Holy Spirit, we talked about it really quick because she had to go.

Yay! (Happy dance!)

I am really excited! I think this is going to be great! We’ll see what the Lord does!
Love you all!
Jessica

The Lord is so funny! Tonight a few of us went to worship on the beach and we met two guys from two different Vineyards here. We invited them to our Monday Crusade meetings. I was like “bring your Vineyard friends!”

I can’t attend a Vineyard here, because they give us only a choice of four churches. But it’s cool! I am excited to see all that I will learn through the church that I’ll attend. Right now I am trying to decide between the Black church and the non-denominational, more contemporary, church. The black church was cool, now I just want to check out the other.

Okay bye again, love you all!
Jessica

Sequel: From Sea to Shining Sea --Jason couldn't handle the suspense!

After I saw my sister Julie I went through security and came to the gate just as my row was boarding. It was about 8:35. Oh no! I guess I was wrong! Time to board.

8:45 we rocket shot out of the air. I fell asleep. I slept most of the way.

It is four hours later. We are about to land and we see big puffy clouds upon us. We go through them. ::swoosh! Jolt! Jerk!:: Turbulence. You can hear the children laugh “wee! Whoa!” The plane shakes and drops and catches itself again. It’s the Twilight Zone Plane of Terror. At this point I was sure that AJ wished he were here.

We landed safely in Detroit. I tried to get on the Internet but they wanted me to pay for it. I was mad. I closed my computer and boarded the plane.

When I got on the plane I squeezed into a tiny seat by the window. For the next ten minutes a child screamed “But I want it! I want it!” The plane then revved up its engines as if it were going to take of and went into reverse out of its parking space. They warned us ahead of time. We taxied and took off. Again I slept. I woke up realizing I missed the pretzels and soda. The passenger next to me told me to call a steward. I did and ordered a Pepsi and pretzels. They were interesting.

I landed, “deplaned” (as the stewardess had said), and went to the baggage claim. “Hmm, no crusade people.” “Meow! Meow!” My phone rings. It is Katrina, my bible study leader.

“Were are you?”

“I am at the airport!”

“Has Ben called you?”

“No.”

“Oh! I’ll have him call you”

“Meow! Meow!” My phone rings again.

“Hi Jessica this is Ben, I am so sorry I’ll be there in thirty minutes.”

Thirty minutes later he arrived. We drove to the meeting just in time to catch the ending. I didn’t make it to the intro meeting but made it to Virginia! From one coast to the Other.

And so the adventure begins!

John Wayne lived here

Its 6:49 am according to the clock over there. I’m listening to the wurring engine sounds mixed with the low droll of the air conditioner in the background, two people walk by and one says, “I mean it’s the terrible twos, we were th…” then a lady on the loud speaker says, “For your safety please closely monitor and control your luggage and packages. Any unattended items are subject to immediate confiscation. Any unattended items should be reported to an airline representative or law enforcement officer immediately. Thank you.” Then a child screams in the background. It is 6:57 am.

I leave in two hours. That is how much sleep I got last night. It is 7:00 am. My stepfather got me here two hours early, he thinks it will take two hours to get though security and check in.

It is 7:01 am, an hour and forty-five minutes left. I might see Julie in thirty minutes she wanted to say goodbye. I will have to go though the security check again. Don’t worry it won’t take two hours to get though. I think I’ll make it in the nick of time with just thirty minutes to an hour to spare. That is when I’ll wipe the sweet from my brow, “Whew! almost didn’t make it!”

yay!

Church was awesome tonight!
I met a new friend, actually a spiritual sister! Her name is Leila (Layla). We ministered and prophesied over each other as soon as we met! It was so cool, I have never been so confident in prophesying before (well it was more of a word of knowledge). God said and I spoke, it just came out! ha ha awesomeness! Praise the Lord!

Tomorrow I Fly! I have to get up at 5 am and it’s almost one! Looks like I'll be sleeping on the plane ;)

Snail mail me:
Jessica Howard
c/o Campus Crusade for Christ
Paradise Resort Inn
516 19th Street
Virginia Beach, VA 23451

Or call me and I’ll try to get back to you!

Disneyland!

Jason, AJ, Rae, Eleanor and I went to Disneyland yesterday! It was fun! We later met up with Doug, Faye, and her Friend. Watched the Fireworks... AMAZING!
Just in these past few college years, whenever I visit Disneyland or talk to someone who works here, it pushes me into a cycle of thought and wonder.

"Should I apply to work here? I could try out for a character, 'so and so' said I would do great! uhh but 'so and so' wants to quit working here. ...But they said they loved it! How come they want to quit? Would I have time if I got a job here? I guess that is were discipline comes in. humm... there are the benefits. I could come any time I want, and sign people in. ooohh and no pressure of getting your money's worth on all the rides and attractions! *sigh… Dad worked there (he keeps hinting that I should work there), I could start some family tradition… it is a blessing to live so close and have this opportunity. … *sigh... Oh! but they kill your weekends! …But if I had a job I’d work on the weekends anyway!"

"Should I get a job?"

Jesus healed on the Sabbath -just a punny title to my post ;)

On Saturday I went to church! I went with my mom and my step-dad (Elery), it has been a long time since I have been to the same church with both of them! (Elery goes to this church, while my mom has been going to another).
The church is called Celebration Center, and is the that church I grew up in. Technically it is a Seventh-day Adventist Church but more like a Seventh-day Vineyard. It is definitely not your ordinary SDA church, full of stuck up traditions created by man. No this church has a dance team (SDAs traditionally don’t believe in dancing) and practices the gifts of the Holy Spirit.
When I was a kid this was the type of church that I grew up in. I remember learning knowing the power of prayer. At my church, children saw visions and angles, demons were cast out of people, and words of knowledge were given to people. The Lord was really working through this church.
Then around 1999, the former pastor of the church made a wrong turn in to adultery allowing this sin and a spirit of perversion into the church, which affected the leaders, staff, and the congregation. The church started gradually spiraling downward. Eventually, out of guilt, the pastor began teaching universalism, claiming that everyone was saved no mater what! The church population started to dwindle, as people started to leave (my mom and I to name a few). I remember one woman was asked to leave the church because she was to open to the Holy Spirit. Eventually the population was so small that the church took out the pews and put in tables and chairs, to make the church look bigger.
It was a sad tragedy. Nobody knew why this started happening. I guess it could have been blamed on the universalism but why did that start? We had no idea of our pastor’s affair, until this year. By the grace of God he was convicted enough to step down from office. The church then found a new pastor, one that believed all that the church originally had believed. It was then we were told the truth. At a conference in February the Lord gave me a word about the church. Basically He compared Celebration Center to Hosea’s wife, and told me that he would bring her back and better than she had ever been.
Well I went to church this Saturday, and wow! The Lord has kept his promises! The church is thriving. Jehovah Rawfaw is doing his healing work! The people are back, even the lady who was asked to leave. The church is a family again! At the prayer meetings supernatural healings are taking place, and the Lord is using the new generation of Children to do what He commands!
During the worship service I saw a little boy stand at the bottom of the stage and just start doing some sign language to the song. It was amazing, no one told him to do it. The Lord told me to go up there and stand next to him (to be lead by a child) but sadly I disobeyed. It reminds me of how beautiful the faith of a child is, and how much we all need it. The child then step onto the stage and stood next to his mother, who was singing, and continued his motions. After the song she shooed him away, but the new pastor when up to the boy, patted him on the back and spoke, what looked like, words of approval to him.
I am so amazed by God’s work and I can see that this is only the beginning of this churches rebirth. I am so pleased to see that the Church is staying open to the Lord and all that He has for them.
(Adding to post)
Another thing that I thought was neat was that as a kid there were things that we did in church that I didn't really understand. Like the "Garden of Prayer" Why does the church all gather on the stage to pray together? I mean I did understand it as a kid, but doing it now as an adult is so much more meaningful. We are praying as a family for members of the family. It was just all in all an awesome experience. I wish I could invest more of myself into this family.
(There is so much more that I want to add but don't have the time! :( if you want to know more you can ask me about it. I would be glad to share. For those of you in Paso you can call me or email me, even if you don't want to talk to me about my post!)
It was such a joy to go back to the family and worship with them! I praise the Lord for His goodness, His healing power and His amazing, wonderful, grace!
P.S. If anyone down here wants to come with me, I might be going this Friday night before I leave for Virginia on Saturday! I have forgotten what the Friday night service is like. It has been so long :(

My Daughter,

I love you and have you in my arms. Be still. Let me embrace you. You are restless and anxious. Be calm. I am here. Look up into my eyes! Do you see the trust they hold? Do see the love they express? Why would I let you go? Why would I ever leave you? You are mine as you always have been. Lie here, and feel the warmth of my chest. Listen to my breath. Breath with me. Peace my daughter, peace.

Let me wipe away your tears; let me hold you in this hour. You are not alone, as you never were. Why do you worry? Have I not commanded you not to? Trust me. I know all things; I am the beginning and the end. I see the path that I have laid before you. I see what you have only seen in part.

Trust my words and here my voice. Do not dwell on the present circumstance, it is only temporary, do not reside in the past, it is no more. Look to the skies! Look into my eyes! I am unchanging, righteous and just. My promises are unfailing, and my love is true. I promise, my daughter, I will always be with you.

Dear Father,

I will give you all my worship
I will give you all my praise
You alone, I long to worship
You alone are worthy of my praise

With all of my heart, all of my mind, all of my body, all of my spirit I will worship you. Everyday is yours, and every decision is yours. I give you my life and all that it holds. There are times that I don't understand your ways, but as you are worthy of all of my worship I will follow them.
You hold time in your hand, you know the beginning from the end, and you have the path laid out for me. Keep me on this path Father! As I want to stray to the side, I ask that you will take hold of my hand and lead me on.

You are HOLY and worthy of all my praise!
I will bow down, I will seek you, I will follow, I will worship, and I will praise you and give you everything!

Amen.

War Dance

Tonight we had war dance worship in the student center! It was awesome! I was Stephen, Eleanor, Doug, AJ, and I.

For some reason I destroyed a block. it was hard to destroy but I got it. It was fairly huge, like a foot in length, a foot and a half in width, and then about three feet in height. I think it was a cornerstone of something. I mostly used my battle ax and hammer/mallet on it (yeah I have those. I got them once when I was praying for my dad and had to break down some walls), and in the beginning my medium sword. It took a while; I had to keep attacking it. I finally got it to about two and a half inches in height, and then I started jumping on it. It’s gone. I think it was a cornerstone because later in the song I took my medium sword and started cutting walls in half, and then easily knocked them over. I saw a push broom in the corner and swept up together, then used a house broom and swept them out side (yeah it was that simple).

Later during the song Awake, I got a Bell! So during the whole song I rang it. In the middle of the song I got a trumpet, so I blew it. I was doing this to wake up people in the spirit realm. The bell was about two to two and a half inches in diameter, but later during another song that speaks of prophesying and says, "awaken the watchmen" my bell grew! It is now about five inches in diameter! I sometimes had to use two hands to ring it.

After this there was a song about missionaries, and Stephen said that he wanted me to get in the middle and pray over me (because I am going to Virginia on a mission with campus crusade). So he anointed me with oil and everyone laid hands on me. During there prayers, I was praying in tongues and began getting words from the Lord. He said that he wants to move, and that he wants to fight, and I think that He wants to go. Then I saw Christ with a sword and armor, and had something strapped around his chest, I don't know if it was a sash or bullets, but in any case, I saw Him and then super imposed was a silhouette of the east coast. With this I prayed "Jesus lead us into battle." it was really awesome!

So now I am tired and I am going to bed!

:)

i think i just set it up so that anyone could comment. :) yay!